It seems like you're always able to make a parallel between anything and God/Jesus. Really, anything. A mirror, the grass, war, etc. Yesterday was a particularly trying day for me in Kaleb world. He's in the stage now where he asks us "Why?" ALL the time. Not only that, he constantly says, "You happy mama?" I feel like I tell him the same answers to the same questions over and over and over again...because I do. As I was driving back to the house last night from Jackson, I was in a not-so-patient mood. Getting close to Magee, a thought came to me. The Bible says to give thanks always. I'm gonna be honest, it's not easy to be thankful in those moments. But I mustered up what I could and thanked God that I was having these irritating conversations with my son. As soon as I said it I realized it was true. Because I was getting frustrated with the whys and the questions, it meant some stuff. One, he's alive. Even when I'm most frustrated I need to remember that some parents would do anything in the world to have their children back and to be as frustrated as I am. Two, he's inquisitive. He's developing his own thoughts and opinions. He's not afraid to ask me questions. He knows that even when I fuss with him I still love him so he isn't nervous to fuss with me. Three, he's a smarty. I'm attributing that to me.:) How will he ever learn new words and concepts if someone doesn't tell him. By answering his questions over and over again I'm helping him build vocabulary and prepare for school. These things don't stop me from becoming irritated, but they DO help me put some things in perspective.
Wouldn't it be nice if this image popped in my head everytime I got frustrated?
When I got home and went to bed I was talking to God about how frustrating it is to have to get on to him over and over for the same things, whether it's hitting, saying bad words, screaming, whatever. And how annoying (Yes, I said it - annoying) it is to answer the whys over and over. That's when the parallel hit me as if God had bonked me on the head like they do in the V8 commercials. That's EXACTLY what I do as a child of God. God loves me and wants to protect me and watch me grow up doing what he's instructed me to do, but I continuously disobey him. I lie, gossip, and think ugly things over and over again even though God has made it perfectly clear that that's not what He wants me to do. And how many times have I asked him "why?" instead of trusting Him? I feel like all I do is ask him why this happened or why that didn't happen. It's a good thing God is infintely patient because if He treated me like I sometimes treat Kaleb, I'd be in sorry shape. It's all about perspective and I really hope I can keep this one the next time Kaleb tries my patience.
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